Blue Sunday V: Not Lost

I opened my eyes. My pupils were dilating and shivering so fast that I could feel the light soaking into my body. A large feeling crept over me. My body felt as numb and frozen as an ice pick.

I jumped up, noticing that the paralsys disappeared from my body. But when I stood up and began to jump up and down, the frozen feeling kept creeping through my veins. I hated this feeling. It scared me. I ran to the tree next to me and slammed my knuckles into its bark. Bruises creased into my joints.

“It’s not going to leave you.”

I heard the voice enter my mind. I jumped, looking around me constantly. Who was this person? Was he behind me?

“Not exactly.”

It was answering me? I smiled with no reason. Maybe Carlisle was with me. But it was only a thought. I closed my eyes again, seeing the horses staring at me with those strange black eyes. The sun blazed down on my frozen face, knowing that I was relieved that there was something about Carlisle that was with me.

I finally opened my eyes. Where was I? I remembered that I woke up with Carlisle next to me, answering my thoughts. But my eyes were too blurred to see anything around me. Now that I saw clearly, I had no idea where I was.

The sun was still in its sunset. I had fallen asleep twice eversince I walked out of here. Why hadn’t the moon come? I wondered if the world was frozen like me. Like a star that had never burnt out. Like a child that had never grown up. It was sad, actually. Knowing that the world would never move on.

 Where was August?

I ran towards the sun, seeing a cliff that piled towards the ground. I peered over the edge, keeping my balance without falling off. I could see someone there, in a black dress. I wondered if it was August. But even if it was, I’d have no reason to yell out her name. I would never talk to her.

A house was in my view, its old wood made me remember how familiar it actually was. That was my hiding place with my little sister. Was Carlisle just waiting for the day that I wandered off helplessly into the dark world?

I brought my hand up to the sun, seeing the bruising slowly transform inside of my skin. Cured?

“Exactly. I knew there was something strange about you.”

I jumped, even though I knew it would happen again. My bare feet slowly sunk deeply into the mud underneath me. What was all this about? Healing? Icy feelings? Carlisle’s conscience?

This was more than I expected. I hadn’t expected anything.

Suddenly, a wind thrust me forward, flinging me off that cliff. I didn’t think anything. I hadn’t even realized I was falling. The ice in my body shot up into my spine, quivering me. I felt my long hair shoot upward like a comet trailing a star. My clothing stuck to my body and aired up like a parachute. This wind shot feelings of warm air into half of my body.

I landed, gracefully, my feet planted onto the ground. My head began to spin. I felt extremely light-headed and felt my legs bring me onto the ground.

On that ground, I could almost hear my head ask, ‘What would this world look like in my opposite world?’

I could almost see it all. The long black roads lined perfect with one another. The black sky with the swirling comets. The dead white trees in the middle of the muddy ground. I could see everything.

I got up, feeling my weightless body become shifted with the wind until my head felt as if a weight was put inside of it. I felt my body tip back and forth until my normality returned. My mind went back to my original thoughts.

Where was August?

I looked behind me, seeing our hideout in no motion. It looked patient, still, empty. I thrust myself into those empty doors, seeing my little sister jump up with tear swelled eyes.

Not lost.